Mom has been attending the day center now for almost four months. We started with two days a week and added a third day a couple months ago. Mom will be going four days a week, starting this week.
When we first started using the day center; Dad was not comfortable with dropping Mom off, but was okay with picking her up. So, I took Mom in the morning and Dad picked her up in the afternoon. This went on for several weeks. After a few weeks, Dad was okay with dropping Mom off and picking her up. We had a few weeks when Mom was more agitated coming home; Mom thought that Dad was abandoning her when he dropped her off in the morning. I starting taking Mom again for a week, this allowed for some adjustment. Things calmed down and Mom seemed okay with Dad dropping off and picking up again.
My dad was picking her up later in the day and noticed that when she was picked up later in the day, she came home more confused. My Mom did not like being the last one picked up. Mom likes it when Dad comes early to get her. My Dad now goes earlier in the day to pick her up. This seems to have worked out well.
Mom seems to enjoy herself there now! She comes home tired most days, which is a good thing. Mom seems to be adjusting well and enjoying her time. I think Mom believes that she works there and this is something that she enjoys. I also think that Mom enjoys talking to the other ladies there. It’s probably much better than being around my Dad and me all day. 🙂
They also do some arts and crafts there. Mom is proud of her work!
I have talked with several members of the team there and they have provided me updates on Mom’s progress. Mom sometimes starts out the day a little confused, but warms up throughout the day.
The team does an amazing job with getting Mom from the entrance of the facility to the day center. I think that this is the one think that makes the transition so much easier for my Mom and Dad.
When Mom started, Mom was like all others that used the day center and it took some time to adjust to the new surroundings. Mom would stand by the door and was ready to go home from minute one. She started participating over time and now enjoys her time there.
One of the caregivers at the facility reached out to me and said the following:
“I am so very fond of your Mom! Your Mom has made great strides here! She has a great smile, too! I love her sarcasm & dry wit!”
I now know where I get my sarcasm and dry wit from! 🙂
I know several of the team members at the Alzheimer’s Association, Northwest Ohio Chapter. They have all told me that when they are around Mom, she seems to be doing very good in the day center.
Mom told my Dad the other day that she likes going there. She said that all my friends are there. They use my Dad’s name and my name when talking with Mom, she enjoys that. It’s been good to make a personal connection with the team members.
When we first signed her up for the day center, we completed in intake interview and provided them with all kinds of detail to help with daily conversation. i.e. family information, key conversations, talking points, what she likes and dislikes, etc. I think the intake and personal connection with the team has helped for a successful transition. We have also participated in a care meeting to talk about eating, bathroom, participation, medication, etc.
Dad is taking advantage of the days that my Mom is at the Day Center. He is able to get things done around the house without having to worry about Mom. I hope that he is able to do more fun things in the future too. It would be nice if he starts taking walks, hitting some golf balls or playing a round of golf. I also need to look into some of the day games for the Detroit Tigers or Toledo Mud Hens. My Dad loves baseball and he ordered MLB AtBat so he can watch all the games.
Looking back at the first day that Mom attended the day center (from January 2013)
Today was the first time that we took advantage of the Adult Day Center! I took my Mom there this morning! she seemed happy and ready for the day! I cried when i walked outside! (It could have been the medication she is on to calm her down) 🙂
A friend of mine posted on Facebook that it was like my first day of school. Mom cried when the bus picked me up; I felt the same way today! I cried after I dropped my Mom off at the Adult Day Center!
I think it was hard because in some ways, I feel that I have failed with helping my parents. I know that I’m doing everything that I can, but sometimes I feel that it’s not enough.
I don’t ever want her to resent me for not being able to be there all the time for her. I don’t want her to think that I don’t care and just kicked her to the curb. I never want to put her in a home! I feel like this is a good step to get her out of the house, give my dad a break and give her a chance to interact more with others. I think by leveraging the Adult Day Center, we will be able to keep her at home and give her a great quality of life. I also think it will help reduce my Dad’s stress level.
I know my Dad has been having a hard time with my Mom (24 x 7) being a caregiver.
We are starting with 2 days a week at the adult day center at the Alzheimer’s Association, Northwest Ohio Chapter.
I’m thankful that they have an amazing staff that has made it easier to leave my Mom in their hands. It’s nice to know most of the team; I have been actively involved with the association and on the Board.
Mom seemed happy when I dropped her off! Dad said he did not want to drop her off; it would have been really hard for him. It was hard for me.
I don’t think my Dad knew what to do today! this is the first time that they have really been apart in a long time.
Dad went back to pick her up at 5! She forgot she was there a few minutes later. When she got home, she seemed in good spirits! The good thing; she did not throw her purse at my Dad or me!
We are going to go again on Friday! I home this helps my Dad get a little break. I also hope that my Mom enjoys the adult day center, activities and meeting other people.